It’s Not Fair

Oops I meant to publish this months ago. Oh-well here’s a look back from August.

Tonight my 8-year-old son experienced blatant gender discrimination and I was helpless to stop it. One of his best friends (who happens to be a girl) had her birthday party today and although he was invited to the daytime party all the other guest (who happened to be girls) were invite to sleep over and he was not. When I told him it was time to leave the party while all the other guest were allowed to stay he protested “but they are just about to start the freeze dance contest.” “I know buddy but we need to get home.” I replied. When we got home he went to his room and began to sob “it’s just not fair, everyone gets to have a sleepover but me.”

I feel horrible because he’s right, it’s not fair! I have  no problem with co-ed sleepovers at his age. The birthday girl’s mother feels the same way, but she doesn’t think all of the other guest’s parent’s would be comfortable with the idea, and she’s probably right. Before we left the party we made plans for him and the birthday girl to have a sleepover, just the 2 of them, before the summer’s over. Although that helped a little, now we are home and he is sitting on his bed sobbing.

So I sit sown next to him and say “I know it sucks and your pissed off. Your right it’s not fair, but that’s the way it happened this time. So go ahead and be pissed off, cry for as long as you need to, and when your done go brush your teeth and go to bed. Because there is nothing else we can do about it tonight.”


1 thought on “It’s Not Fair

  1. It’s not optimal, but it is fair. No one’s rights were stepped on. The person with the authority made the decision and it was followed. Efforts to optimize the system are fine, but please don’t claim everyone else has a responsibility to do so simply as a human imperative.

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